Do you ever wonder if other moms are having the same issues as you are with temper tantrums? Well, you aren’t alone because they are a popular thing at my house. My daughter is 4 and she will cry until she gets her way or she will close herself in the closet and cry until I give in and comfort her. I am beginning to realize that this is not helping the situation but it’s making it worse. The more I tended to her when she is having these breakdowns, the more she realizes that she is getting her way. So at her 4 yr check up, I spoke to her Dr. about this issue. By the way, a Dr. can be very useful so ask as many questions that you can think of while you are at those pesky visits.
I finally learned a way to cut down on the tantrums! I asked the Dr what to do and she said to…ignore her?! I felt like I would be a terrible mom if I ignored her when she was crying like someone stole candy from a baby. Okay, so it wasn't neglected after all if I let her scream and cry, while trying to get her way. I feel a great relief now that I know that I can ignore her and let her cry it out because I knew my way was only making things worse.
Now, my daughter not only cries and closes herself in the closet but she also bites herself at times or scratches herself. I also asked the Dr. about this and she said to let her do it and continue to ignore her so she realizes that hurting herself is not going to bring a reward. This is harder said than done because sometimes she has the nerve to even say that I don’t love her and that I am being mean. I do explain to her that I am not being mean and if she would listen to me then she wouldn’t get into trouble. Your children may not be to this point but I have been allowing her to have these tantrums for some time now and catering to them because I wasn’t sure what to do. A little advice, stop it before it gets out of hand, trust me, you will regret it if you do not.
So it has been about 2 weeks since her Dr’s appointment and she has had maybe 2 tantrums, both I have been able to ignore her without feeling bad. The other day my daughter was biting herself because she didn’t get her way. She was actually telling me to look at her and was pointing out that she was biting herself. I didn’t look and I didn’t pay any attention to it, she kept repeating herself “mommy look, I am biting myself”, as I continued to ignore her, she soon gave up and stopped. Okay so maybe I am getting somewhere with this ignore strategy. I am going to continue and hopefully, the tantrums will be a thing of the past.
Moms don’t give up on your kids if they are having tantrums; do not let them get away with them! Another thing I have learned is that if children get away with attitudes and continuously get their way when they do not deserve it, they will grow up to be very selfish. Do you ever wonder why people are so rude in today’s society? Well most likely they were spoiled and always got their way, they were taught that they don’t have to work to get things and they were taught unintentionally that they are better than others. If you look at it this way then I hope it will encourage you to put your foot down and take control of your children. To make the world a better place, it starts off with parenting and how we raise and teach our children.
